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Over the last couple of months i recieved a couple of stories i couldnt understand or thought were ridiculously stupid. Read them here.
2 vs. 2 tourny

One time actually yesterday March 3 me and my friend ricky where playing in a 2 v 2 tourney. Our first game I shot my Autococker completely Kapp. The cocker and I where just not getting along that day so I switched to my old school Tippman Pro Carbine (old and outdated but dependable and gets the job done). As soon as I did we won our first game. But anyway to cut to the chase, My friend was in a bunker in front of me our fourth game I seen one of our opponents flanking our right side so I yelled Ricky 1 on the right side. So ricky goes on a suicide mission charging him and taking him out but he was also taken out in the process. So it was me and a 14 year old kid. And I was like ok.... I stepped out of the bunker slowly expecting to recieve fire. I stepped out .. no fire.... I slowly eased out a little more I could see the flag (we were playing center flag). I thought I am not far away from it at all. I knew I could get to it if the kid did'nt see me. I was like ok no fire I can deal with this this is cool. So I get withing 6 ft. of the flag and dash toward it. I start recieving fire I grabbed the flag and got the points but when I started up the hill to hang the flag I was hit 11 times in the ribs the legs and the back. After the game I said "OMG I am in pain" and walked off the field. At least I got the flag. ~Justin~

three of my friends and I were at a local field, and it was near the last game, so my friend and I went down to this river to wait for the other team. three other guys from my team decided to be idiots and share our bunker. we had no outer contact with anyone else on the field, so I sent my friend (since everyone on my team by the river appointed me "leader". about three minutes later, I hear my friend go awe d----! so I figured that he got shot. we were taking heavy fire from upstream, so we decided to go across and get a better view of the other team. we ended up getting three people out on their side, and then I peaked my head over the river bank to see what was going on, and I see five people coming at us with fancy auto cockers! that took me by supprise, so I started yelling oh s---! were gunna die! oh god! turns out we did die. and they didn't stop shooting.
Glendale, California

It was a warm october day ,we were playing at the "field of dreams"It was my friends Chase's birthday little did he know that i had another birhtday present for him and his dad. the whistle sounded and the round started i didn't go very far when i saw my friend Quinton and Chase's 5 year old step brother junior, I took aim at junior and hit him in the facemask.Then i took aim at Quinton,then out of nowhere i saw flash of red and knew instantly that it was Chase's red jacket out of habit I shot , and hit him about seven times in the ear then i saw his dad'sknee sticking out of a spool and i shot at it 5 times and hit him 3 times in the knee but the balls didn't break(OUCH!)then I relized that i was out of paint , before i could yell out he tagged me twice in the facemask.and i was out. by: Ryan

My First Time Paintballing
It was my first time paintballing and me and my friens Jay were waitin for
everyone to show up. Then he says lets have a one on one game. I have a
Sheriadin and he has a Spyder Compact and it was my first time playin. So i
was at a big disadvantage. But i didnt know this untill I got nailed in the
head. We started like 30 yards apart. I was behind a wood pile and he got
behind a tree. He started moveing from tree to tree. He was geting closer.
I shoot a few at him. None were even close. He ran up about 15 yards away and
started fireing. I thought he had stoped fireing and i turned around from
the wood pile and bamm.... I got nailed in my face mask.

Patience Pays Off.
I was playing a game in some undeveloped land behind a friends house. It was the first game of the day and we had decided to send one team out into the field (my team) and the other team to chase after them. We had 2 minutes to get into position. I decided to find a nice spot and dig in so I could give my tem good cover. There was a large fallen tree laying laterally on the ground on a hill with a shrub in front of it which gave me perfect cover. I sat the for almost fifteen minutes before I say anyone (even from my own team). All of a sudden the battle switches directions and the action comes to me. I hear from Jason that their team is up on the hill in front of me so I an my Spyder SE decide to stay put because there is no chance for me against three very experienced players with Bushmasters and Autocockers. Two members of my team come up behind me and decide to stop in front of me to see if they can get a shot off on the other team. What happened was one person Adam went up the hill and got into a huge fire fight which he obviously lost. The other player Tim picked a tree near mine and stayed there. Well a member of the other team was now coming down the hill and saw Tim next to me, but didn't see me. He took a position where I had a very poor shot because of the shrubbery but Tim opened up fire on the kid (Kyle) and Kyle said to Ben that he could easily take care of this one guy. He takes another position behind a tree in which I have somewhat of a shot. I wait and take aim then open up fire I hear him scream SHIT! while he calls too his team mate (Ben) but by that time another one of my teammates has snuck up behind Ben and got him out. Anyway we unload on him for like two minutes from two angles Tim pushes him out enough to where I can get a piece of him and then I tag him in the arm which proves my point if you are patient they often will come to you.
This is not a full proof tactic and has gotten me shot before.
Paintball in Cincy

"Roamered in the back-the value of team communication"
i played a scenario a while ago called "2nd embassy" the rules where simple enough, one team MUST stay in a huge building and survive while team two (that's mine) must eliminate all to win, the game lasted 45 minutes and the team in the "embassy" got to have 2 "roamers" that snuck around and attacked us. the game started very well and we (me, my friend Nate his cousin Rock and our friend Casey) and took position on all four sides of their base (its was surrounded by smaller buildings) as time went on we heard reports that both "roamers" where out. so, thinking that we no longer had to watch our backs we moved closer and closer to the enemy shooting in the windows hoping a stray shot would take the remaining guys still held up inside. we slowly drew back because a nasty guy inside decided to let out a vicious spray with his super-semi auto (nice huh?) we took position in a side building and started shooting at them again (we where new and liked to waste paint) so there we where with our backs to the far wall and...SPLAT!!! the "roamer" who was out wasn't really "out" and he picked a nice way to tell us, nate, casey and rock went down quick and i was hit buy it didn't explode (hehehe) in one swift move i looked down and checked myself (clean) whipped around and blew off five rounds into his mask (ahhhh that's better) he left and i found myself thinking, if our team hadn't been to hasty and told it like it was three of our guys would still be on the field. i learned later that Nate had seen the very roamer who pegged us sneaking around the side of our building but didn't think he was an enemy so he didn't shoot. the moral is to NEVER over exaggerate and ALWAYS be ready for the unexpected (nobody's perfect-we all make mistakes)

sent in by Brian Ford

We were playing at this abandoned field in my friends neighberhood. A simple game, Me and my friend Chris hunt them. This was the first game of the day so my other friend Kevin didnt show up yet. Me and Chris had the better guns so it was us vs. 3 kids. So were walking around in this field (no bigger than a little league baseball field) for about 20 min and they havnt shot at us and we havnt see them. So we start yelling at the top of our lungs fo them to shoot us while were standing in plain sight of this vast field. We see movemnt so we start moving towards it and then my friend Chris realized that he is allready hit. So its now me vs. 3 kids (not a good thing). So now i have 3 kids fireing at me and Im in an open field. So I sprint towards the fire and these kids are still fireing at me. I get to a stone wall (like the old 1890 ones from farms) and take some cover. What I dont realize is that a kid Mike is on the other side like 20 feet to my left. Now Mike, not the brightest bulb in the bunch forgets his mask this day so i start fireing at him. I keep wiching between him and the 2 other guys. Then bam! I hit mike in the face, hes wearing like diving goggles. Hes got this nice 1 and a half inch welt on his face. Then bamn i see a kid run out towards me. I end up hitting him in the face mask. So 2 down then I get shot in the head by the other kid. So were done with this game, then we see 2 cops come into the field and tell us to drop our weapons with the 9mm drawn. We tell them whats going on and the forgive us and let us go. So the games continue...

sent in by JCfreakjediboy

trouble in the trenches(the tale of the blundering "coverman") i went to a park a while ago that was built around a de-commissioned army base. it was a great place and had all kinds off cool fields.we where playing in this place where the goal was to put our flag in a center pod while the other team tried to stop us the field had all these trenches (about 4-5 feet deep) that went all around the whole place (with little footbridges to cross) i started with a team of 7 guys (5 to run the trench and 2 to cover us) we where supposed to run down the trench and plant our flag, well i should have known it was not that easy. we didn't know this at the time but they took out one of our snipers right away and the other one chose not to tell us and be a hero playing the two man job. we charged and ran all the way to this little bridge (by this time the other stupid cover man was out and we didn't know it) me and some other guy sat down under one of the foot bridges and SPLAT! right in the back of our heads we where out (leaving only 3) the other 3 (who told me afterwards) said that they tried to rush the post that was heavily guarded and got splattered up and down. i was told later of what happened with to the covermen and i was really mad! i guess the moral of the story is watch your own back our have someone you know and trust as "Coverman"

sent in by Irish Devil

Story #1
This is an amusing tale of blue-on-blue (friendly) fire. It was my first time paintballing, and we were on a fairly open field with only a few beech trees and bushes on each side for cover. I was in a defensive position, and two of my mates decided to make a run for cover up ahead, behind a bush. About five minutes later, I hear a marshall shout "STOP!" closely followed by "HEAD SHOT!" (in this particular site, head shots don't count) "PLAYER HAS FIVE SECONDS!" Suddenly there's a rustling in the bushes ahead of me. Acting purely on the fear of being rushed, I fired off about 20 shots into said bush. A hand poked up behind the bush, signalling a kill. I was just congratulating myself when my friend, covered head to to in paint, limped out of the bushes and made his way to the dead zone. I still haven't had the heart to tell him it was me...
Story #2
This was about a week ago... I had secured a job as a marshall at the same paintball site, and was on flag marshall duty for one of the teams. We made an impressive push up the line, and had crossed the center trench. I saw two guys in a hut, and told them to move foreward as there was no immediate resistance. About a minute or so later, the same guys came running through the bushes, on track for our flag base. I waited for the other teams flag marshall to come after them, staying with his flag, not to mention a hail of paintballs. But... nothing. Only after I had legged it back after them (not my job) and caught my breath, did I realise they had CTF without the other team *or the flag marshall* realising. Needless to say, the rest of the players were ROFL for a while!

sent in by Nick B.

This here is a story from quite a while ago when i just got into paintball: Me and my cousins Jeff, and Sam, were all out in our grandma's property. They just got some talons and I got one too. It was our first game ever. We had our crappy little Brass eagle masks and our 45 round hoppers. Well anyway, my cousin Sam goes down first. I just wait a while for jeff to come at me because it was 2 on 1 me and sam against lemzed (Jeff's nickname). About 30 minutes passed and i got sick of waiting, so i walked like some tough dude thinkin I was so bad. I walked toward the base, i was about 15 feet from it when Sam peaks out behind a tree and yells "Watch out nick hes got a full Co2!!!" I was like OH CRAP and I try to grab some cover but lemzed rises from the base and all i hear is this weird "chickla flump, blang!" and before i knew it, i was on the ground with a fat welt on my forehead, nearly knocked out! (thanks to the crappy quality and only 85% coverage of a brass eagle mask. Directly on the skin!But thats not the end. Im resting on the ground and t! hey were like "you okay?" i said ya and we all sat down for a bit. Then lemz walks off about 20 feet, whips around and shoots me in the leg! OW! But next game i got him back bigtime. My grandma discovered a treestand high up in a tree that was at least 50 years old. So, 10 minutes before the game, i load up, and make my way to the stand. My dad was on my team this time. He lures lemz into my trap. LOCK ON TARGET! YOU HAVE THE GREEN LIGHT! Kathump! The paintball went screaming and stuck him in the top of the head! We were no more than 15 feet away! I had a perfect view of him but i was camouflaged. Then Sam sent in the paintballs and a heard these whizzes right by my head. One stuck me in the goggles and i fell out of the tree!I got stealth and tactics, but when it comes to talons, melt them, they suck, and i had to wait when he was within 20 feet of me to shoot! Moral of this story: Get an automag and be a street dominator!

NOTE:please don't send me hate mail about the brass eagle masks and talons comment! I didn't write this story!

FRIENDLY FIRE sent in by Dale R.
I'm Heston Roewe from Iowa. My dad, brother and me all bought Spyder TL's awhile before my friend Shane got his Spyder Compact so when he got his gun we had him over for a game (Iive on a farm). So anyway it was Shane and me against my dad and Taylor. Near the start of the game Taylor and dad came around behind us and started to fire but Shane and I took cover behind some large metal tanks. Shane was behind a tank in front of me and we were both firing from the side of the tanks. Shane decided to turn around just when I fired. The ball hit him when my barrel was against his arm. Luckily he was wearing a baggy sweat-shirt and it hit him on one of the wrinkes . The ball bounced of and he hardly felt it.

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